i didn't think that i'd find myself liking a japanese drama in late 2021. in my opinion, japanese BL dramas have consistently been lackluster, boring, repetitive, and just...not good. so i was reluctant to like this show. i was REALLY reluctant. alas, i found myself unable to stop thinking about these two. when i first started watching, most of the episodes weren't out yet, and for the first time in as long as i can remember i was itching to know what happened next in a show. maybe im just too picky, maybe i just don't watch things enough, i don't know, but it's rare for me to think this much about a show

what i liked:

story:

this drama has made me want to read the novel. i will be buying it whenever i am next able to visit japan. the relationship between the two main characters is one that reminds me of the reason i enjoy BL manga in the first place: the darker stories, the animal-like, intense emotions, veering into territory that may be dubbed problematic and toxic by some, but i LIVE off this shit. i dont want to see the same kira kira romance repeated over and over. i want something a bit more gritty. i want the characters to be a little off. yeah, i know it's toxic and wouldn't make sense irl. that's the point. that's why stories exist. it was such a breath of fresh air to see their intense, hectic relationship portrayed as these two characters battled with their emotions and morals. i especially love how hira viewed kiyoi as a king or god plus the cinematic actions taken to represent this and i'll talk about this more later.

i don't think the story was too complicated or that the characters were too complicated, but it was so different from what i've seen from Japanese BL and BL in general, i guess, in the past years that it was an entertaining story to watch. at times, it felt like the two main characters were the only people in the world to each other, and i liked this aspect especially. maybe to some it would make it feel like the world wasn't fleshed out enough or that other character's didn't feel real, and i can agree with this somewhat, but to me it immersed me within the mindset of the main couple, that only them two existed, and further intensified how much they meant to each other. i LOVE how creepy hira came across, and i love how this was openly accepted as creepy, how mean kiyoi was. i loved all of it. it felt raw and real and toxic and. yeah. at times i even got uncomfortable watching hira, but i loved how it made me uncomfortable. i love stories like this.

in terms of directing, there were some compositional choices that alluded to kiyoi's position as "king" that i appreciated. one of them was when they were all sitting at hira's low table in the dining room? kitchen? area? and kiyoi is the only one perched on the couch, while everybody else is on their knees. the shot is set up so that the viewers eye is guided to the "king" on his "throne". also when they start to become "friends" and kiyoi sits in a chair while hira lays on the ground in front of him to do homework. another example is when hira is made to bow down and kiss kiyoi's hand, a more in-your-face symbolism, but i appreciated it nontheless. it also made it contextually significant when the characters would be set at the same level, or when hira would be placed on top of kiyoi, symbolizing that their roles are becoming more equal in each others eyes as they mature.

oh also, kiyoi not becoming an instant success overnight and having to resort to diner theatre and work his way up was also a nice touch that showed how human his character is.

acting/cast:

okay, so for a drama literally named "beautiful him", yusei yagi doesn't really cut it. he's pretty okay looking, and in some of that soft warm lighting i genuinely think he's pretty. not horrible to look at like many of the BL dramas ive seen.....but i have two excuses for this. one, it's BL, a smaller and less sought after industry, especially in japan. you're not gonna get the most attractive, best, expensive actors. two, i think the fact that he's not really stunning brings humanness to his story and role, and also makes yusei's powerful and king-like performance more striking because he's able to have such a large presence. i really liked his acting. there were sometimes these subtle vulnerabilities in his eyes that he only showed to hira. so good. for a BL drama, you can really tell that he had passion for this role, or at least that he is passionate about his acting career enough to do a good job. sometimes yusei slurred his lines a little bit but i didn't really mind. his angry scenes were really nice. there was a lot of inner conflict kiyoi had and yusei reflected that in every one of his actions. really really nice job.

hagiwara riku was EXCELLENT. i think he got cuter as the drama went on but he has this puppy-ish appearance with a bit of a pathetic slouch and a sad expression. it fits this role SO well. the different ways that he would say "kiyoi" were sometimes so full of emotion that i just sat there like, "damn". he portrays that creepy, pathetic, kind of insecure but incredibly loyal character extremely well. he looks more like a "commoner" than yusei yagi which i also thought was very fitting because yusei has more of a pretty boy idol type look, which, well, was his character. that creepy, raw smile that crept onto his face and made me uncomfortable when he saw kiyoi again for the first time since highschool.....SO GOOD....the way he said "that's impossible" during kiyoi's confession scene....ugh, so good. i finished today and i already want to rewatch it. maybe i'm just starved for good acting because of how shit a lot of BL have been lately, but god did i enjoy hagiwara's performance.

music:

kinda random at times. i liked the darker sound of the end theme, especially at the end of the first episode. really got me hooked. not much to say. one thing though is that the opening song was way too happy for the tone of the drama, but okay.

rewatch value:

i finished watching today and i already want to rewatch.

things i think could be improved:

pacing was weird at times. i wished kiyoi's character got a little more fleshed out, maybe then it wouldnt have felt so weird. i feel like hira's first confession moment happened too soon. could have felt more natural if maybe there was an extra episode or two. another weird pacing part was how quickly the final confession happened.

loved how hira's character was obsessed with kiyoi but i do wish there was a bit more to his personality besides he likes kiyoi and taking pictures, but we saw a bit of that personality shine through at the very end after they get together.

they actually kissed which is good. the first one you could barely see their lips touch, though...... that last episode though, nice, but after seeing how intense the scenes in dramas like "Dark Blue and Moonlight" got i feel like they could have gone a little further with the make out considering how intense these characters feelings re for each other, but it didn't really ruin it for me. just maybe less vague silhouette neck caressing. c'mon. but i guess we've gotta ease the general audience into these things.....

overall:

this is the only other drama i have written a review about on this website besides a rant about coffee and vanilla. really hope that says something. go rubber ducky.