To My Harry (2024)

Shin Hye Sun Running Circles Around Oppas that Can’t Act and a Crappy Plot that Can’t Plot

You know a writer has overestimated themselves when a show with an interesting premise, distorted timelines, flawed characters and major potential turns into pure, convoluted, nonsensical garbage.

❌ The writing and execution in this is seriously bad. Like one of the worst I have seen in a long time. While the drama starts out very promising with unreliable protagonists who slowly reveal their intentions, it loses the plot somewhere in the middle and just ends up being vomit on screen that calls itself a script.

❌ Some things are added just for the sake of it - no logic or reasoning required. Random dead bodies in random freezers, random trucks of doom, random cabins in the freaking forest. There is so much randomness is this show, I was half convinced the writer was on shrooms.

❌ The drama tries desperately to be complicated but ends up coming off as confused as a floppy fish out of water. This was what I was afraid of when I saw who the director was. I have watched almost all of his dramas and things with him go either way. Either he nails his execution and gives you masterpieces like 25-21 and Search WWW or he completely fucks things up like in King Eternal Monarch. Unfortunately, this drama has the same floundering headless chicken execution that King Eternal Monarch had and it’s just sad.

❌ Then, there are the crappy love interests. There are literally three of those in this drama. The third ML is there for no reason. He is also basically a brother figure of the FL’s long term ex boyfriend (the ML) and his pursuit and feelings for her are just awkward, messy and add zero substance to the plot. Just one of those random things the show throws in just for the sake of it.

❌ However, ofcourse, the major downfall of this show are the two main oppas. First of all, neither of them are good actors. They are bland, plastic and have zero nuance to them. Also, their screen presence is in the negatives. I swear Kim Nam Gil’s sock has more screen presence than all of these 3 oppas combined.

❌ Second of all, both of the two male leads are severely unlikeable and selfish for the majority of the show.

❌ The first ML, Hyun Oh, who breaks up with the FL after eight years of dating is trash human being number one. He is selfish and thinks that the world revolves around his mommy issues and the fact that he has two dozen grannies to take care of.

❌ Oh, poor him, his sad oppa problems give him a get out of jail free card to be the most toxic, wishy washy faded red flag that you want to 10000% avoid in real life. And, when I say red flag, I don’t mean the sexy bad guy red flag, I just mean dirty mud blood red flag that is just disappointing and annoying.

❌ Their entire relationship is just about him. He constantly makes her feel like he is better than her and she constantly doubts herself. After dragging her along for eight years and breaking her heart, he still doesn’t cut it off clean. He keeps giving her mixed signals and doing things for her she never asked for so she can never fully move on. And the moment he hears that she COULD move on, he is all scandalised about it.

❌ This man’s head is so far up his own ass that he never realises how someone who he has claimed to love for YEARS is in unbearable pain. And while, I did like their past relationship scenes together and was initially rooting for him, with every episode it seemed he just got worse and worse. By the last episode, I wanted to throw him off a cliff and call it a day.

❌ Then, comes the second main oppa, Ju Yeon. I didn’t like his and Hyeri’s (Fl’s second personality) dynamic from the get go because it came off childish, awkward and silly. Which is fine because that was who Hyeri was supposed to be as a character. What is not fine is that when he learns about her disorder, his reaction is the WORST thing imaginable.

❌ Instead of consoling her or feeling for her, he makes her apologise for hurting him, REPEATEDLY. And then, keeps insisting that she bring the other damaged personality around because he is in love with it.

❌ The whole delusion around the fact that he is in love with a fictional personality and wants her to remain sick just so he can fulfil his own kinks is SICKENING.

❌ After that, I really didn’t see the romance in him waiting around for the personality to show up. It was just stupid and even though the drama later tried to convince us that he’d take her as both Hyeri and her original personality, his actions clearly reflected that he is still very much hung up over Hyeri.

❌ Ofcourse, it’s inevitable that the oppas do get some redeeming moments in the last couple of episodes where they finally focus on people other than themselves but I don’t really give a fuck. I make judgements on characters as the way they are throughout the entire drama not their last minute actions and from the way these two were, the only happy ending for the FL would have been was to stay alone and away. Hell, the 3rd ML who was basically irrelevant cannon fodder was the most likeable option.

❌Also, speaking of shitty things in this drama, let’s talk about the whole DID thing. I usually don’t care about the science and logic of these tropes and I don’t care here either but I feel like it’s almost romanticised. This constant question of were you more happy as the other personality? Then this whole grown ass man being in love with and constantly reinforcing the other personality after knowing the woman for one single MONTH.

❌It gave me a bad taste in my mouth because the FL’s second personality is just a defence mechanism and it’s unnatural, born out of trauma and shouldn’t even exist in the first place, much less be reinforced and constantly validated.

❌ But, I shouldn’t have cared about the technicalities because this drama seriously does not give a shit about authenticity. It pulls out the worst “Oppa’s love heals everything even if it’s freaking DID” card I have ever seen in a drama.

Especially when that love is toxic, unwanted, weirdly codependent and downright stupid. They didn’t even try to pretend like they were using the illness as anything other than a plot device.

❌ To top off the nonsense, every single problem in these people’s lives MAGICALLY gets solved in the eleventh episode. DID? Cured by good old Oppa humping. ML’s reason for breaking up with Fl in the first place which led to this 14 episode worth of junk being made? Solved in 2 seconds. Love triangle? Solved with a good old smiley, breakup date.

It is just outlandish how bad the writing is. There is no real healing or character development anywhere. You won’t find it even with a NASA grade microscope.

✅ So, is there anything good about this show? Yeah, it’s Shin Hye Sun. She is one of my favourite actresses and like always she does an excellent job here as well. Her acting range is insane. She is nuanced, charismatic, expressive and delivers both her roles with perfection.

✅ I loved her as the damaged, sassy, broken, insecure, overly dependent and deeply flawed Ju Eun Ho. She made me feel for her struggles and I absolutely rooted for her. (Atleast, I did root for her before she became a manic panic obsessed oppa groupie who was legit like “I missed your toenails” to her shitty ex boyfriend.)

✅ While I wasn’t as much of a fan of her Hyeri personality with how over the top she was with the whole childish get up, and the exaggeratedly slow speech, I still appreciated SHS for it because it did the job of what the show wanted to deliver with her.

✅ Shin Hye Sun grossly overpowered all other actors with her talent in this drama and it showed. She single-handedly carried it on her back and I hope she asked for a freaking full body deep tissue massage along with a hefty paycheque for this.

✅ To be honest, there are some other good aspects of the show as well. For one, the skin ship and the kisses in it are good. Some episodes pack a surprisingly emotional punch. There are some great cinematography and OST moments. Moreover, the ups and lows of a relationship in flashbacks are also nicely shown but overall, it’s not enough.

❌ Because when you don’t have all the plot holes, the unlikeable male leads, the bad acting, the terrible writing and the confused timelines, you have uninteresting side filler characters taking up the screen.

❌ The grannies are boring, the office people are annoying and all other supporting characters are lacklustre. The only one interesting side character is Hye Yeon but she doesn’t have enough agency to make you invested.

❌ Which is why, on the whole, this drama does feel like a lot of wasted potential and has the tendency to turn your brain cells to rot.

Take my free advice; save your time and your IQ and go watch something else.

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What happened to this drama?

I never really imagined I would drop a drama starring Shin Hae Sun, but I can’t keep watching this toxic show.

As if having to endure this “actor” wasn’t enough, we also have to see this kind of thing in 2024. A drama that was supposed to be about a woman healing from childhood trauma has turned into an abusive story, with a character who has spent all the episodes saying the worst things to her.

I did want Eun Ho with Joo Yeon, but even more, I wanted to see her healing and a decent conclusion for her sister who disappeared. This drama could be called "Dear HyuOh" because everything we've seen so far has been about him.

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Better Change the Drama title

The writer used Hyeri as a character to have the audience drawn to the drama. Of course, Hyeri was like a dream in my mind while watching this drama as for Joo Eun Ho. I Watched Every minute of this episode hoping for Hyeri to appear anytime the writer did trick us over here. There was no clarity on the characters. I went from a fan to a hater over to the whole casting crew as the script seems to have a meaningless ending where one character does achieve everything in mid-way one disappears just because it was some different personality.


A Story Should End Happily or Sadly THE STORY THEY BUILD AROUND THE CHARACTER HYERI WAS NOT ABOUT HYERI IT WAS ABOUT JOO EUN HOO which really disappoints me as a viewer.

Shin-Hye Sun did deliver the character Hyeri to us to a point where I expected a better ending for Hyeri, not Joo Eun Ho.

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The award for the BEST INTRODUCED DRAMA goes to "Dear Hyeri".....WHY THOUGH from a 9.5 to an 8.0 :(

What a start......... I would say. The first two episodes of this drama are a 10/10 for me. The way they portrayed the character's intro without any confusion........the clarity of the plot.............wow, I was in awe when I just finished watching the first 2 episodes.

I haven't watched any kdrama with a similar plot so this story is kind of refreshing to me. I think the first two episodes narrated the story and the rest of the story is just the HOW & WHY these things are happening. So, at times I just felt the narration of the story could have been extended to few more episodes so that the backstory of the leads wouldn't have felt draggy.

I just want to share on opinion of mine:

I was like really angry with the ending and the writer of this drama. How can the writer expect us to see Eun Ho and Hyun Oh together when he portrayed Hyun Oh as a not so boyfriend material....not being able to communicate properly about his family situation to his Girlfriend.........And also the writer portrayed Kang Ju Yeon as the ultimate green flag and the perfect person for either Hye Ri or Eun Ho and he expects us to see Eun Ho and Hyun Oh's endgame.....what bullshit. I am mad at Eun Ho as well, how can she accept Hyun Oh to be her bf again....even though he did not explain his side of story to her yet......

[Excuse my bluntness.....but after watching this drama I felt like I had to share this info with someone/somewhere......]

Coming to the Acting & the visuals - only one word: MIND-BLOWING. Can anyone have any complaints with Shin Hye Sun's acting....no....NEVER. The MLs are really good looking especially Kang Hoon and I really liked their acting. I didn't even know that these MLs existed but I'm just 2 eps in and I really am loving Kang Hoon......he's soooooo freaking handsome and with his acting &visuals, I can't get him out of my head.

Yes, it is just me simping over Kang Hoon but the way he portrayed the desperate Kang Ju Yeon, saying that at one point he just wants to be with Ju Hye Ri even though she doesn't exist - is one of the best things. There are many instances, where I felt like I would like the writer to change the whole plot at one time and give my boy Kang Ju Yeon a happy ending with Ju Hye Ri.......it doesn't matter if it is going to happen in a parallel universe.

And apart from Kang Hoon I really liked Jeong Jae Young and Kim Shin Jung(Woo Young Woo's father LOL) characters. Their presence in the drama and the way they make us laugh is kind of refreshing. Woo young woo's father is a versatile actor and would like to see more of his works as a father and can't wait to see him as Woo Young Woo's father in EAW S2(if it is going to happen) <3

I just watched the drama in 2.5x speed and got through it somehow.......the logic is okay but it is not maintained through out the story is what I felt.....If only the hyeri's character could have gotten more justice it would have been so much better. The title is 'Dear Hyeri' making us all think about it is going to be about Hye Ri or about the illness that FML has but the story is all about Eun Ho......Not fair.....It gave us false expectations :(

For those who are WONDERING TO WATCH THIS or not: I would suggest you just give it a try even though you might feel disappointed in the end but Shin Hye Sun's acting and Kang Hoon's acting & Visuals are going to make up for it. If you can't bear to watch the 50 min /1hr episodes try watching it in 2x speed.

PS - Great Start!! But they made us have false expectaions......a little disappointed!!!!!

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Romanticizing a Toxic Relationship Does NOT Make It a Healing Drama

I love Shin Hae Sun. My acct. pic is of her. I've raved about her other shows that were healing and wonderful and have said nothing about the ones I didn't love as much out of respect for my love of her. I cannot in good conscience not speak up and warn people of the trigger warnings in this show. If you want a healing comfort show, go look at my other reviews of her other shows.

⛔ Trigger Warnings:

⚠️ This show seems to want to convince the audience that it's a beautiful true love story between a woman who doesn't love herself & the man who doesn't love her either who reaffirms her low esteem beliefs about herself. It's shown as romantic, sweet and healing not sad, tragic and infuriating. Though the latter was what I ended up feeling anyways.

⚠️ Toxic ML says the most cruel things to the FL that's usually reserved for the villain of the show or a toxic ex that the FL escapes from.

⚠️ Abusive behavior like rejection, gaslighting, negging, abandonment, ghosting, verbal cruelty that lead to years of insecurities and pain that lead to a mental breakdown are never treated as such, it's shown as a normal part of a great love story. As long as a woman "loves" (more like obsessed & addicted to) a man, "love" of a toxic man is all that matters. Not Sanity. Not self-respect. Not mental well-being. Not self-esteem. Not self-worth.

⚠️ Gaslighting messages from both the show & the ML are normalized & romanticized. Healthy green flag men who love consistently and are good for a woman's self esteem and confidence are not good matches but a man who gives mixed messages and keeps a woman unbalanced & feeling like she was never good enough for him because he said that to her face multiple times in words and actions is a good match.

⚠️ Sexist ageism is portrayed in the show as just what happens on top of the fact that the real age of the leading actor is 8 yrs older than the leading actress but in the show they are supposed to be the same age. The ML clearly looks at least 10 yrs older than the FL but we're supposed to ignore that and believe they are the same age while being told that the FL lead is "too old" for the 3ML when she was maybe 1-2 yrs older but looked practically the same age as the 3ML.

⚠️ Severe mental illnesses like depression and Dissociative Identity Disorders (DID) are "cured" by ways in the show that in real life would most likely lead to that person ending up dead or permanently broken - or both.

Toxic messages to pick the red flag men over the green flag men were the reasons why I stopped watching American shows and "romantic comedies" and why they don't make money anymore at the box office. It's sad that in 2024 this kind of unhealthy, ignorant and even dangerous messaging still exists. I'll always love Shin Hae Sun's other shows, Thirty but Seventeen and Angels Last Mission: Love. If you want comfort shows or a love story that will make you feel good vs icky & despair, then go check out those shows.

This show was so disappointing that I don't think I can ever trust the Screenwriter: Han Ga Ram or Directors: Jung Ji Hyun, Heo Seok Won ever again. I definitely won't watch anything by them in the future until after the show ends and I see lots of ratings before ever feeling safe to watch something of theirs ever again.

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Romanticized codependency masked as love & healing

No character development, just need to believe in the power of love and everything will work out fine, coz why not they love each other but the problem is that's not love. It's not that it's impossible to heal, save a relationship, etc. but the writer portrayed the ML as too toxic and their relationship too emotionally abusive, codependent, lacks respect & honesty, etc. and then couldn't write how he could be a better boyfriend, just let the girlfriend accept him coz she loves him kind of story, miss each other, love each other, kiss & make up, call it a day.

Very poor portrayal of DID. Often these mental health issues are portrayed poorly but this is just stupid & hopefully doesn't bring a lot of negative impact for those who are actually trying to heal from it, coz the portrayal is trash so let's just not reference it, ever.

Just putting all the conflicts in all aspects of life, family, love, workplace altogether but when it's all messy, there's only 2 episodes left to clean up, let's just assume everything will be fine, pray that the leads chemistry & acting will save it (no chemistry for me, honestly it was disgusting to watch, but I wanted to finish it & review).

Focused on cliffhangers and reaction-baiting-scenes but the overall story messy. If only the writer focus more on the story, then maybe it would've worked out, but it just didn't work out, it's hated, congratulations.

If you enjoyed it, I can't understand how. But good for you. I hated it, enough for me to write a review when I usually just drop dramas I don't like & move on.

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Stayed through 10 eps for Shin Haesun and Kang Hoon

I dropped this series not because Hyeri/Eunho didn't end up with Jooyeon. It's because I can't stand the fact that Eunho chose to comeback to his ex after all those shits she went through because of him. I just can't get it why are you still able to go back to a person who confessed that he was embarrassed while dating you? This kind of humiliation is enough for me to leave someone, and if they lucky enough they won't get beaten by me. I'm enough with 1st ML's hero complex, this grown ass man who can't communicate properly, I found myself that I can't sympathize with him whatever his unfortunate background story is.

I'm not saying that Jooyeon is the most perfect male lead here. He also has his own flaws but the 1st ML is THE WORST of all characters. Don't tell me that I'm failed to grasp the depth within this shitty 1st ML character because I've tried to understand him but I really can't.

So many annoying things about this drama especially the plot and the character development (I've read the ending spoiler) but Shin Haesun and Kang Hoon's performance is really spectacular. I hope they can reunite in another good work. Writer Han Garam, I hope my fav actor/actress don't work with you in the future.

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To my Haesun / Dear Hye-Sun

***Final Update (from October 30th, 2024)***

The last four episodes don’t hold back on beautiful performances. Since I don’t want to spoil the story, I’ll only offer temporal hints.

Not only the actors but also the director and the cinematographer do their work masterfully. At the 30th minute of episode 10, seeing the frame where three men sit almost as if in a storefront—each in his own display frame—Quentin Tarantino’s name comes to mind. The presentation continues to be artfully executed.

From here, in episode 10, right through to the end, the story is imbued with deep emotions, and Shin Hye-Sun proves herself to be one of the best of her generation. This is especially evident in the 63rd-minute uncut scene, with two tears rolling down at the end. This is not a light drama.

For those who grasp its message, this drama will be deeply cherished. It’s not toxic. It’s melancholic, beautiful, and sad, but ultimately, it is soul-healing. Why? That’s the very philosophy of the work—Hyeri embodies the essence of a fleeting, brilliant phenomenon...


*** Update from October 18th, 2024 (before watching the 9th episode)
The eighth episode is a quiet one...
... a quiet episode...
If the eighth episode were a film, it would be an Oscar-winning one. Shin Hye-Sun's performance is outstanding, as are the others’. The director's work, the way the cinematographer captured the scenes, and how the sound engineer almost plays with the sounds — all of it is artistic and masterful.
... a quiet episode.

*** Update from October 12th, 2024:
I am adding this to my review after watching the sixth episode (and before watching the seventh). The film's title, To My Harry / Dear Hye-Ri (with many variations due to the multiple transliterations of the Korean title), is slowly beginning to reveal its possible meaning, and after the sixth episode, that meaning fills me with a bit of dread. It seems the title is the beginning of a message written to Hye-Ri. What fills me with dread is what that message will turn out to be. (So far, the title hasn’t revealed much, much like the title of Umberto Eco’s film-adapted novel, The Name of the Rose.) As for the rest of the review, nothing needs to be changed yet. The characters continue to wonderfully unravel the threads of the story.
*** End of the Update

Obviously, after watching only the first four episodes, it's difficult
to give an exhaustive review. However, the series has had a very
strong start. The story is already dynamic from the very first
episode. The screenwriter (Han Ga-Ram) avoided the mistake of
giving the series a tedious and drawn-out introduction.
The director (Jung Ji-Hyun) executed this well. The beginning of the first episode shows just enough to put the viewer in a clear position of understanding.

The story constantly holds surprises. The screenwriter doesn’t
resort to cheap solutions, making the narrative engaging and
smooth.

As expected, Shin Hye-Sun’s performance is reassuring and
brilliant. Her portrayal of the dual personality (Joo Eun-Ho / Joo
Hye-Ri) beautifully and subtly echoes her past successful roles (My Golden Life, Mr. Queen, See You in My 19th Life). Hye-Sun creates a wonderful and very enjoyable atmosphere... together with the
others like Kang Hoon, Jo Hye Joo, Lee Jin Uk, and the rest, though I won’t list them all here. They mutually and advantageously
complement each other’s roles.

We haven't yet had a behind-the-scenes look, but as is
characteristic of Shin Hye-Sun’s dramas, Dear Hyeri is marked by
beautiful visual solutions, subtle gestures, and their perfect timing. Shin Hye-Sun reveals these gestures in the most sensual moments
to the viewers – or perhaps it’s the other way around, where these delicate gestures create the enchanting moments.

Right from the start, they tell the viewers, 'This is not a love story.'
However, the viewer might still hold on to some hope, as the scenes between Hye-Ri and Ju-Yeon (Kang Hoon) are delightful (and at the same time, there’s so much uncertainty vibrating in the background – the fragility of the budding relationship is almost palpable).

Jung Hyun-O (Lee Jin-Uk) is, to say the least, an unpleasant character, and thus a difficult role. He’s not exactly likable, but he represents the darker side of events. Strangely enough, he does have some likeable moments, though the viewer might prefer to dismiss him. As uncomfortable as Jung Hyun-O may be, he is necessary; without him, the entire story would lose some of its captivating power and wouldn’t be believable.

It’s clear that Shin Hye-Sun’s role is the current that drives the
events forward, and we can’t yet see how the dual personalities will battle or assist each other. Hye-Ri’s conversation with her
psychiatrist at the end of the fourth episode is heart-wrenching.
And as she tries to communicate with her other self in an effort to
protect herself (Hye-Ri). The dual personality of Joo Eun-Ho / Joo
Hye-Ri is very different. While Eun-Ho is well-defined and
purposeful, Hye-Ri’s boundaries are blurred, and she is a vibrant,
colorful personality with surprisingly sharp insights and direct
solutions.

I’m already looking forward to the continuation... and I’m also
worried, because if the introduction is to be taken seriously [‘This is not a love story’], many heart-wrenching events are still to come.

Aja

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had everything to go right but it didn’t

I was honestly so freaking ready to absolutely love this drama that it came as a HUGE let down the way things started to develop around episode 5…
The authors said this was supposed to be a healing drama, but from the cast, that counts with a main lead with a history of sexual assault, to the frustrating romance and lacking of proper conclusion to the main lead’s mental disorder, this was truly a failure.
The drama started off great, with Shin Hye Sun truly shinning with her acting and the narrative that felt just so good, however, that fulfilling feeling didn’t last for long.
The author was determined to push a couple on us that just wasn’t it. Rather than love, I think that what Hyun-oh felt for Eun-ho was closer to obsession, while Joo-yeon truly came to love and accept her along the way, which lead me to truly root for them, holding on to straws, hoping the screenwriter would see the light and go with what made more sense rather than what she had planned for the story at first… what a dumb ambition on my part.
Honestly, everything they showed us about Hyun-oh to justify his actions just made me dislike him even more. He was truly a man child who couldn’t communicate with the woman he claimed to love, although I can’t really call it love when he was so willing to let go of her hand without ever truly explaining to her his reasoning, simply letting go of an 8 years long relationship with a “let’s breakup, hope you’ll be well”, because she wanted to marry and he didn’t. And while that’s understandable, it’s also maddening, because he never gave her the choice to stay or explained why he didn’t want to marry in the first place.
Moving on, we had the relationship between Joo-yeon and Hyeri (Eun-ho’s second personality), and although there was a frustrating moment when he found out about her disorder, it was understandable, and he later came to terms with it, choosing to love Eun-ho because no matter what, Hyeri was a part of her. And while he was worried about her well being and looking out for her, Hyun-ho got stuck on the part that they both were dating, and be damned that she had a mental disorder ‘caused by such grief and pain… Honestly, what a horrible main lead if I might say so.
And after all that, there wasn’t really a proper conclusion to the Hyeri thing, because she simply disappears at some point without an explanation and never comes back, even when Eun-ho goes through some great distress, where she should’ve resurfaced in full force, but didn’t, and my best guess for that it’s because of the few episodes they had to put a conclusion to things.
As a psychologist myself, I was greatly disappointed in that, honestly, although I guess I was expecting too much of this having Kill Me, Heal Me as a reference when it comes to a drama addressing dissociative personality disorder.
Eitherway, this drama had the potential to be one of the best dramas of this year, honestly, but in the end it had a frustrating ending, about timing for love and stuff (which I didn’t buy, because Hyun-oh only woke up to life because Eun-ho started to show interest in someone else and his obsession kicked in), and never really gave proper closure to the one thing that the drama rotated around, going so far as naming it over this…
If you are thinking about watching it, truly don’t, but if you still want to go ahead and give it a try, do so with low expectations, because this one won’t live up to it.

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So I’m really curious as to what happened to the real dongsaeng. There’s no backstory on what really happened to Hyeri. I was left hanging for that.

And somehow I think some are just being one-sided because of the actor’s past just like some comments when he acted in Voice S2. Anyway, everyone is entitled with their own opinion.

I’m team Ex since, that’s how it should be. They found healing in each other, rooting for SL is somehow a nah since he’s inlove with the other persona of her. The final/ good breakup says it all. She said that he’s inlove with the person that is not her. So why still root him for her? Eventhough there are lot’s of negative reviews maybe some people should still try watching this w/o being bias to the actors. I still love Shin Hae Sun that’s why I finished this.

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