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Nice view, would have appreciated some more detail ond 2nd couple
Overall I liked the story.I accept it's a trope and I wasn't bothered, but ML got much less flack than SML probably on account of being hot, despite being the kind of overbearing and brash rich playboy that ought to have driven such ire, even flirting with his cousin's gf, plus the whole thing with the kiss, where he can be a player but it's expected that his gf having been kissed (indeed, she is a virgin, antother trope) -and not even reciprocating- before they got together would have bothered him. Frankly, no need to bring it up if he doesn't ask, just as his previous experiences, but not something he should be lied about if he does ask -now, if this was cheating during the relationship then she should bring it up, but it's another case-.
I believe in general that "doing it for the other person" is utterly self serving and blatantly untrue -the person in question is the only one with the right to decide what's good for them, and you cannot pretend to care while carrying on an affair and lying to their faces, you are doing this for you, and at the end of the day whatever your motivation, it matters more to you than giving your partner a modicum of loyalty, respect and honesty, and breaking things off without deceiving them-.
Again, I got the feeling that it was reflective of HS's, the SML's, pain at the betrayal he had to suffer through for more than a year, but in reality imho he is better off knowing, and ultimately only the person him/herself can decide what's good for them, it's not a call the one that did wrong is entitled to make -with the excuse of "wanting to protect" and "doing for your own good", oftentimes it's self serving, and you even get to feel noble to keep the secret rather than reveal it to unburden yourself... outta here with that hogwash-.
Overall I would have liked more details on the background of the second lead's relationship and cheating/running off/running back again (why? what prompted the change of heart, then and now?). The cheating was hidden until the end (and not shown in flashbacks, conveniently and somewhat unbelievably focusing only on happy moments without thinking about her with DK during the tormenting more than year long betrayal, etc.). I felt kind of manipulated by the cheating reveal happening late (I assumed that she had just dumped him), but it was probably done for shock value -though it's then kind of swept under the rug- and possibly so that it would be late enough in the game that the viewer is already committed to the pairing.
I found YJ entirely self entitled and with no sense of perspective, and entirely focused on her feelings while ignoring her bf's. He confesses to knowing of her more than year long betrayal and demeaning himself to uselessly beg her to stay, and she ignores the show-stopping fact that he knew of her lies and proceed to ask how could she love someone else after all that (the question should be the exact opposite: how could he love *her* after all that, and in what universe does she think she is even remotely worth it, let alone entitled to, as she seems to believe, him giving her a second chance and wanting to be with her, given her past -and present, for that matter- behavior), and talk about her feeling pathetic for him watching a message when she was not looking? After lying to him for more than a year and him forgiving her, and demeaning himself to beg her to stay, then and now, when she used the man she cheated with to threaten him and make him jealous, saying he loves her still and she might start to reciprocate again? She has the gall to talk about broken trust after lying to his face for more than a year, and leaving for two, then coming back expecting everything to be the same and for him to still be in love with her and only her, without doing anything to rebuild the trust *she* had broken, and worst yet, she was basically right, i.e. he took her back, begged her to stay a second time, and all she did to get his love and trust was just stay there and not leave? Even in the end, the admission that she left because her pride wouldn't allow her to tolerate him leaving her... after he swallowed his pride to ignore her year long deception and cheating, her leaving with another man for two years, and continuing to talk with and meet up with the man she cheated with, and him pretending he was okay with it and shaking the guy's hand as if nothing had happened, and having to play along as she mocks him with hurt pride, mocks his understandable insecurities she just recently exploited, intentionally, to make him jealous... she knew very well the effect the man had on him, and didn't care to extend any consideration even when she was the one that was supposedly trying to get back together with the ex she had betrayed and was supposed to act to rebuild trust, which she never did.
Frankly, him staying around and waiting for her, and having no other experience other than the aborted unrequited mini-crush that he got so much grief on (utterly unfairly, considering the context -they are about a billion to one-) was unrealistic, as is him having flashbacks only of the good times when he carries this much pain about her more than year long betrayal: we are not show those memories, which realistically he should have had, because then we would have had to consider the fact that he really has no reason whatsoever to pine after her, when basically anyone else (or nobody: better alone than in bad company) would have been a better choice, having never betrayed him in such a manner. Her threatening to leave him with DK, who still loved her, and using the latter to make him jealous, only staying when she realized the absurd unfairness of her behavior, but even then not waiting for him and giving him space as he did, but turning back when he begged her to stay -so still pressuring him into compliance rather than giving him space-, as well as her attitude of considering him having a mini crush on the same level as her more than year long betrayal and running away for two year, only coming back when he broke up with DK, and having the gall to talk about trust and feeling pitiful and pride, when he was so humiliated and was basically lacking any self respect and self dignity, debasing himself to beg, at the time and now... to use DK to make him jealous and threaten to leave with him to force a decision was sociopathically self entitled.
Frankly I am flabbergasted by Yoo-joo’s attitude. She seems to truly believe she can cheat on, neglect, and mistreat Han-sung and he will always be there for her. Unfortunately for him, he got so much flack for this unrequited mini-crush (especially when you consider that all he did was send a few charming smiles her way and sneak one teeny tiny kiss), despite having forgiven his girlfriend's more than a year long betrayal still being not only willing, but begging, to stay with her at the end of it... he has to beg and grovel for her to get over his momentary interest in someone else, begging her to not leave for DK once again.
The more than a year of cheating changed everything for me, the flirting, the cousin, and keeping in contact with the man she dumped HS, as well as the lack of any consideration for HS's feelings and his lack of comfort sharing what he felt wrt DK (with good reason, given she is impatient and mocks him, which he plays along with, playing it cool, while still feeling disturbed... it's not good he cannot open up, and they didn't talk about her cheating and then running off at all, or the reason for the breakup, all things that should have realistically been part of rebuilding trust, and yet it seems that the fact he pines after her and her not leaving should fix everything she had broken in and of themselves... no, broken trust and psychological damage is not fixed like that, otherwise people would choose to flip a switch and be okay, and nobody would need therapy)... they turned from HS' insecurities for being dumped and her sassy attitude within the limits, to something much more sinister, considering she *did* cheat for a year and lie to his face, so he knows she is capable of not being honest with him and backstab him. I feel that the writers put off the reveal to such a later date because then people would be "invested" enough to ignore it, which was largely the case.
All in all, I must say YJ and HS's relationship did seem unequal, with him not even drinking coffee with other girls while she flirted and talked on the phone and met up with the man she cheated on him with, with plenty of rather inappropriate touching with cousin and DK, both of which were in love with her, and one of which did come between her and her boyfriend, leading to more than a year of cheating and her running off with him for two years. Also, two different standards, where she is not willing to give even a fraction of what HS did, and is triggered and complains of trust and pride and pathetic when he was put through a billion times worse (while he was not even reciprocated after his small kiss). They were not equal in their actions, nor in what they were willing to give the other. Verbally she says she loves him more than him does her, and that she is equally triggered by his mini-crush, both claims leaving someone somewhat in disbelief, because she didn't really do anything to show it (nor did he really require her to... when he asked for space, she threatened to leave him for DK, again, and then she almost did -in any case abandoning him for a few days-, then he was beaten into submission and asked her not to go), and because even if true, it's on one hand nice to see her jealous and finally not taking HS for granted, because it means she cares, but on the other hand it's similar to the sexist, unequal situation where you have a philandering husband having plenty of affairs, and when his wife looks at another man he divorces her on the spot. He was willing to wait for her, she was not.
I particularly hated the bit about her cooking kimchi and doing house chores (which they are both more than rich enough to delegate), because like in This Week My Wife Is Having An Affair this seemed to be missing the point: this is like a nice car without engine, if you are dealing with someone lacking loyalty, honesty and that betrayed your trust, the fact that they cook for you is both besides the point and an insulting notion (are you really telling me that I am supposed to be "won over" by such a cheap tactic). It's not a substitute for loyalty, respect and honesty. I would have very much preferred to see her do something to rebuild trust (not that I think it would be possible in reality, and not that it is necessary in the drama: she just shows up and he takes her back, but it would have been nice to see her at least try, while she does absolutely nothing to rebuild trust or address his very valid fears, concerns, insecurities, resentments, which swept under the rugs or made the object of ridicule -insultingly comparing more than a year of lies and running off for two without another word, even after he begged him, to a one sided mini-crush that ended before it even begun, and a small one sided kiss-, and he has to play along), or refraining from doing something that further destroyed it (like flirting or talking to/meeting up with one one one with a still smitten ex-lover that she had cheated with, and that despite protestations to the contrary HS clearly had issues with and for good reason -and she knows it, otherwise she wouldn't have used him to make him jealous, nor she would have bothered to ask if he had an issue: she knows, and she knows she cheated with him for more than a year and run away for two, and that the guy is still holding a candle for her, and not only is she aware of this fact, but exploits it, and indulges his flirting/touching which was not really appropriate given the context of the cheating... again, before I could chalk it up to being sassy and her being inconsiderate or naive, but the "make him jealous" part and the way she teases HS clearly shows she knows he has an issue with DK and for good reason ("strange to hear you say something nice about DK", etc.-). Hard to see care or a desire to rebuild trust.
In terms of that part, I was kind of disappointed to see HS object to the working overnight and drinking, but not to the cooking and housework, while she was pregnant. The bit about him working and drinking was nonsensical, really, because there is a clear difference: he is not pregnant. Sure, it woulad be nice for him to abstain as well in solidarity, but particularly the drinking is something that she does not need to do, professionally, and that is obviously hurtful to the child (I don't know if this is something about the time period or place, but in the drama they do mention that the doctor made that clear to them, and there was a scene were she was about to drink and refrained, prior to the night of drinking with the coworkers). It made the miscarriage all the more horrible, because one couldn't help but wonder.
Wish I had more context about her affair with DK, why she left and why she is now back. She claimed to love DH. Did she love him more than HS? Did she stop loving HS? How could she deceive him? Why has she suddenly chosen to come back to him? What changed? If she jumped back in my life after not seeing her for two years (plus more than a year of betrayal) I would have been very curious to get some answers to those questions, they should have certainly discussed the DK elephant in the room more. And she should have tried to rebuild trust or done anything to convey that she cared that was not about her (as running away was), but rather about fighting to have HS in her life because it mattered to her (as he did by taking her back and begging her twice). But he did not require any convincing, and he was "scared straight" by the threat of her leaving him for DK, the man she had cheated with (something that ought to have given her pause and elicit some sort of guilt, but she barely apologized, and it's not clear to me whether it was for running off or for the affair, and whether she knew he knew at the beginning of the drama... she does not comment on it, but it's really not something that should be treated as her just dumping him, because lying to someone for over a year, systematically, has very different implication about basic respect, honesty, etc. and changes things). Why did she come back? Was it because DK cheated with the "underwear model"? But he still loves her? Was she the one that realized she didn't love him and loved HS? But she did say that she did love DK when she run off with him. This is something that not only I want to know, but that HS should have wanted to know as well, to understand what is going on.
The actors claimed that at the time they didn't get YJ and HS's relationship (from what I have seen they don't say that they get it now, but I might be mistaken). At 34, I would say that I don't really "get" it in terms of "look at this enlightment and wishdom I get because I am so mature", but I do get what is going on, and frankly this was the emotional abuse equivalent of a wife beating drunk persuading/gaslighting the battered housewife with stockholm syndrome to get back together. It's not realistic for him to pine after her for years and not ever pursue anything besides a still born romance, and take her back with such minimal attention to pain, physchological damage, insecurities, broken trust -it's brought up in episodes, as in This Week My Wife Is Having An Affair, and frankly even less, given that he takes her back immediately and when she threatens to leave him for DK again, impossibly he begs her to stay and it erases his thoughts about other women, rather than reaffirm them given the sociopathic cruelty of such an ultimatum to manipulate him and make him jealous, in light of the affair... again, nice that she was jealous, because she cares, but also chilling that she would do such a move to twist his arm-. I wish they had made her simply dump him. The fact that she lied to his face for more than a year when she was seeing DK behind his back is frankly the hardest part to square with the claim that she loves him more than he loves her..
I mean, how could she not see how much she had hurt and humiliated him, how miraculous him being willing to give her another chance was, and how she has not felt even a billionth of a fraction of what she had put him through, over more than a year of lying and then abandoning him for two years and coming back and upending his life, expecting him to have waited and take her back, when she was not willing to do even a fraction of that for him... and yet, the flirting she didn't stop, the ambiguity with DK, etc., which all take a very different meaning and light considering she didn't just dump HS, but cheated on him for more than a year. The intimacy and caresses from someone than loved her, and contrary to HS's cousin, had an affair with her while they were still together for more than a year, before YJ run off to NY for two.
When she mentions trust, pathetic, pride, etc.. over him reading a message? How could she not also think about the billions of times worse humiliations he had endured, his suffering over more than a year of affair and lying, her running off for two years and disappearing from his life despite his begging... Without a sociopathic level of shamelessness and self entitlement/self centeredness, it's impossible to understand how she could say this with a straight face, and while it's good that she feels jealous because at least she cares, it's also unjust and completely insane that she has no sense of perspective and does not acknowledge, or even think of, how much worse he must have felt given what she had subjected him to, and for how long.
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To orchestrate such a well-rounded drama back in the days is unbelievable
Hats off to the drama's soundtrack compilation which I give at least 40% of the credit this drama is my all-time fav. With an excellent OST album full of k-indies, there is no denying that (yes, the storyline and staff did their job well but) the music sets the mood ready to dine in the quirky, upbeat and heartfelt human interactions of the whole drama. The decision to utilize indie bands as extensively as it did is still not a common choice in kdramas. I love (love) that this drama introduces a lot of concepts that were neglected in asian series back then(can you believe it's 13 years ago)! It portrays romance that surpasses gender and also independent and career-oriented women from a medium that everyone can enjoy. Believe me, as much as I would like to write a 2000 word essay of the good points of this drama, I'll just leave it here by saying Coffee prince just ages like a fine wine! I've watched it at least 3 times throughout the years and found the characters still relevant (some characters like Han YooJoo even more so now than ever). I for one easily put coffee prince in my top 5 kdramas out of thousands of dramas I've watched.Questa recensione ti è stata utile?
Taking into account when it was made, it's phenomenal and ahead of its time
ADVICE: If you can step back and put yourself in 2007, this Drama was a big deal for the time and is quite beautiful. I only watched it for the first time this last year, but I made sure to not judge the script and story based on today's values. That said, watching it through the lens of today, I can understand why some people have a big problem with the premise and the female main character's actions. In a time when being gay almost anywhere in the world wasn't only dangerous but also stigmatized and perhaps even classified as a mental illness, the journey of the ML is a fascinating one, and an important one. I think, for me, it allowed me to understand why so many non-straight people really struggle with their sexuality.But, obviously, the FML isn't a man, thus the story's direction and conflict change direction and become about her duplicity, which is fine / makes sense, but it splits the drama into two different shows. For me, this change without real resolution for Choi Han Gyul's first / internal conflict felt like a bit of a letdown, if I'm honest. Looking at the show through the lens of today, I wished the show would've explored Choi Han Gyul's realization that romantic love (for him) isn't limited by gender. He fell in love with the person first, not their gender. Admittedly, the show draws this conclusion without stating it explicitly, but I think it moved on too fast. Which is fine, I guess. But I wanted the ML and FL to have the conversation, "I fell in love with you. And I would love you if you were a man or a woman or non-binary, because it's you." That would've been a powerful message for people to see and hear and be exposed to.
I also have to call out Gong Yoo and the way he *looks at* his FML in his dramas once the character is in love with them. Cheese and crackers, this guy and his looks. I don't know how he does it, but it's like something within him flips a switch and, when he gazes at the FML's character, it's all heat and desire. How does he do that?
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Delightful drama, lead chemistry unmatched
The first romance kdrama I watched and it set the bar high. Despite it's age, the dorky y2k hairstyles, and low production value, it is 100% worth experiencing the amazing storyline and acting. Everything feels more natural and the story can be experienced more authentically without the fancy VFX of our times used to overcompensate for bland writing.I was honestly iffy during the first half of the season because it does drag (hence the 9 rating). And some of the characters behave in ways that are... very frustrating. Relationships between them are various types of toxic. But there is payoff – thankfully their arcs are written well enough so that their journeys of self-reflection ultimately remedy this to an extent (for a piece of lighthearted fiction, at least). The character development for the ML esp is well done – slowly transforming from insufferable, toxic, hot-tempered asshole to someone who is more empathetic and understanding. Together the leads are adorable, endearing and the chemistry is genuine and incredible. But it does take a while to get there.
Supporting cast is also great. The second leads have a more complex and confusing storyline that slows the pace of the drama, but they present an interesting contrast to the struggles of Eun Chan as well as some commentary on society's evolving gender dynamics/expectations of the time. The princes are annoying at times but also hilarious. Surprisingly I was quite emotionally invested in all of them by the end. I do wish they gave us a longer epilogue.
Since watching Coffee Prince, I haven't found a romance since that hits the same way. Sigh I guess they don't make them like this anymore
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Enjoy little things
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Une petite douceur
Voilà un drama qui m’a vraiment fait passer un bon moment, même si l’histoire en elle même et les histoires secondaires ne sont pas très recherchées.Gong Yoo est toujours un bonheur à découvrir- et chapeau à Yoon Eun Hye qui joue magnifiquement cette femme garçon manqué.
Leur histoire est complexe au départ, le lead féminine se retrouve vite empêtré dans ses mensonges.
Quand à Gong Yoo, il est ultra touchant dans le rôle de cet homme qui lutte contre ses sentiments et lui même pensant que cette femme est un homme.
Les rôles secondaires sont aussi tour à tour drôle et touchants. Je ne me suis pas ennuyée et j’ai vraiment passé un joli moment, et ai été ravie de découvrir Gong Yoo plus jeune.
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Nice conflicts
Nice conflicts.In terms of the sincerity of YJ's half uttered apology, one thing that I would very much like to know is whether it was meant for leaving him, or for lying to his face for more than a year and seeing DK behind his back. Was the the one that confessed it, or did he discover it on his own? I must say that if she asked him to take her back without telling him it would be pretty damning, in terms of deprieving him of the ability to make an informed decision.
Another aspect, of course, is why is she back now. She didn't call for two years, and now she is back and only now utters the apology. If she and DK had not broken up, would she have gone to HS and apologized? So her feeling sorry and apologizing depends on the success of her relationship with DK? Or did she decide that she was in love with HS and broke up with DK because of that (or did DK cheat with the underwear model?)? And if she was not in love with HS, does that mean that she shouldn't come clean to him about the betrayal, or not apologize? Not that we know what happened. And does she regret the cheating? Or following DK to NY? She still says she run off with him because she was in love with him. Does she regret it now? Both or just the lying for more than one year part? And would she regret it had things worked out between her and DK?
All this makes it pretty difficult to gauge what she is feeling sorry for, exactly, and the fact that she is apologizing now that they have broken up, but didn't bother to say a word to HS for two whole years does make it pretty difficult to understand the sincerity and value of the half uttered apology. Her subsequent behaviour, even with respect to DK, does further call into question her feelings on the matter, because would someone that genuinely feels guilt about what they did to HS really diminish and mock his insecurities, or use DK to make HS jealous and threaten to leave him for DK again, or brush aside the pain of HS knowing about her seeing DK behind his back for more than a year, or throw in his face the fact that she left him because she loved DK and followed her heart, and he couldn't stop her even by begging, just like he couldn't stop her now, or make lights of her betrayal and HS's feelings towards DK with that horrible joke scene at the end, where he was forced to play along in half disbelief, which reminded me of the "jokes" they made around his attraction to FL?
In short, what is she sorry for, and would she be making this apology if she was still with DK? She didn't talk to HS in two years while they were together, after all. Not feeling sorry and/or not feeling the need to apologize until things were going well? Or to say a word to him for two years? Only discovering she felt sorry and wanted to apologize now that she wants a to rekindle the relationship with HS, and not even leading with that, not touching upon the topic after the half uttered apology when he had already let his in the house? A sincere apology would have related to her lack of honesty (and she would have come clean about it certainly before asking HS to take her back, not that I am asserting she did not as we are not told), and would have been independent from whether things with DK went well or she wanted to be with HS again, and it should have probably happened two years ago, not now that she and DK have broken up and she wants to get back with HS. I mean, no to appear too skeptical of her sincerity, because we know very little about the circumstances (and I wish the should would have elaborated) and we don't even know why she broke up with DK (maybe because she felt she wanted HS instead? And contrary to what she did to HS, she didn't want to deceive DK for some reason, so he extended him a courtesy she didn't extend to HS for more than a year?), but her not saying a word to HS and then coming back with a half uttered apology two years later when she wants him back does seem more than a little self serving.
Frankly, I felt the same way I felt with the wife in My Mister... where basically the apology happened only when things with her lover didn't pan out and she learned that DH had discovered her betrayal. Had none of those things happened, there would have been no regret/apology. Same thing for This Week My Wife Is having an Affair's case, honestly, where it felt perfunctory and too little too late. They felt similarly self serving.
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Nice show
Nice show.With YJ, the bizzarre thing is that I had more questions about her behavior and doubts about the sincerity and timing of her apology that apparently HS had, given that he called her out on very little of it, and even then dropped the matter afterwards. On one hand, the claim that she is sorry and loves him, on the other hand, the timing of the apology (now that she has broken up with DK and wants to get back to HS after not a word for two years... had things gone different with DK would HS never heard from her again? No apology or anything of the sort?
Seems a little suspicious in terms of the timing that she would suddenly discover she feels enough regret that she wants to apologize, right after she and DK broke up and she wants to get back with HS. But the irritating thing is that we are not given critical information such as whether she did leave DK because she was in love with HS. But then again, this is a different question from her feeling the need to apologize to HS... I would have feeling guilt eat away at me in an intolerable manner if I had deceived my partner of almost ten years that I know loves me completely, it wouldn't have come two years later (it's even unclear whether she knew he was aware of the more than year long deception when she asked him to take her back, and if she knew he was not it would be frankly an appalling information to withhold, but again, maybe she didn't hide it from him, we are simply not told).
I mean, not a word in two years, and suddenly she is both apologizing and asking to get back together? What is going on? Is she feeling sorry because she wants HS back, and wouldn't have felt the need to apologize otherwise? She apparently didn't provide such an apology, nor any other word, while she was in NY with her lover for the past two years. It does all seem rather self serving and all too convenient, and in HS's case I would have more than a little trust issue and question for her. Not that the show provides much information for one to form a complete picture (we hear about a certain underwear model when she talks to DK and he asks about the musician, but it's not clear if it was DK's rebound after they broke up, we don't know why they broke up, specifically who broke up with who, though DK apparently has feelings for her and she does not for him, but apparently loves HS and want to get back to him instead, while HS's cousin basically puts it in a way that makes it seem like she has broken up with DK explicitly to get back with HS... but then again, apologizing for lying to HS for more than a year is something that should have been done years ago, and should have been independent from the question of whether she loved him or not, yet it's not even clear whether she knew HS knew, or whether she even come clean about the more than year long deception, though we know that he had discovered it was going on in the more than one year where she was seeing DK behind his back, so HS had discovered it beforehand in any case, at a time where she was still convinced she was successfully fooling him when she lied to his face every day... though I must say, the way she brushes that aside when he agonizingly brings it up does undercut her half uttered apology from the first episodes... again, as a viewer I was second guessing her more than HS did, and had far more question about the whole situation).
One horrific thing about the situation is that HS basically didn't hear a word from her for two years, and yet had to routinely hear about her romantic life with the guy she had been seeing behind his back for more than one year, before running off with said guy to NY, from the press. She is a celebrity, it's unavoidable.
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Nice work
Overall, a nice dramaWith 2nd lead storyline, one thing I wish they had focused more on was the bombshell dropped on the side of the streets on the way to the airport that HS knew and put up with YJ seeing DK behind his back for more than a year before running off with him. This to me changes things considerably, and I really, really wished that they had discussed the issue further.
To be honest, if she had only dumpted him, while painful, it would have probably been the best option had she decided that she didn't love him anymore and she loved someone else. It would have meant she had been honest and upfront, and the feel I got up until that point was flirty/sassy but fundamentally honest.
I tend to be the opposite of jealous and so I would not be disturbed in the abstract by the flirting or meeting the ex, even on-on-one, in the general case it could be a sign of the strength of their trust and the honesty in the relationhsip. However, context does matter, and if you add the fact that she had dumped him all of a sudden and not seen him for two years, things get a little creepier. If you then add the fact that she run away with said ex, and that he still has feelings for her (and, might I add, gets touchy/feely/pretty intimate -she allows him to pat her on the head, etc., puts up with his flirting and only cleverly shoots back, doesn't set up clear boundaries... this is more disturbing than allowing teh cousing to rest his head on her shoulder or lap, because the cousin never came between her and her bf, while DK did-). There is also the fact that even if she had not cheated, HS basically saw her walk out of the door without a second word, and then come back two years later, so he would have some trust issue/insecurity regardless, so it does seem inappropriate and insensitive, particularly when she is supposed to rebuild said trust (if at all possible, which is not a given).
But the fact that she actually lied to his face for more than a year before running off with her lover changes everything. In light of that, her behaviour is completely insane, the baseline of trust is very much not there, because she broke said trust, and "inappropriate" does not even begin to cover it -DK is not only the person that she run off with, but the person that she was with behind HS's back while telling the latter she was working. That's a completely different thing that dumping. Dumping essentially means being honest and upfront about her feelings and telling him he doesn't want to be together anymore, and it's the opposite of cheating (I find the notion of thought crime ludicrous, and think that everyone is allowed their fantasies, see non-jealous part above... but on the thought crime part I am dead serious: you cannot control your feelings for someone, if you don't love a person anymore and love someone else, the only two options are backstabbing your partner or leaving them, and as unpleasant as it is, at least it's honest and respectful -you treat them with dignity rather than humiliating them and treating them like a fool, or putting your own convenience ahead of basic respect and honesty in a completely self serving manner-). It's the respectful and decent thing to do. Lying to HS's face for more than a year is something else entirely.
The way she reacted to a little one-sided mini-crush with a one-sided small kiss makes the whole thing even more absurd: he is taken to task for his feelings (not really for the kiss), which frankly approaches the "thought crime" part, and the context very much matters: she might have a leg to stand on if she had not lied to his face for more than a year and then run off with another man, but he lived through that and forgave her, and she almost runs off with her lover over something so comparatively insignificant, giving the excuse that the standard is that he never even drank coffee with another girl. So, because he is much more trustworthy and honest as a baseline, it doesn't matter that he was willing to wait for her (for years), and forgive her more than one year long deception, while she cheated on him for more than one year, run off with DK for two years, and she finds no issue with her flirting and having this ambiguous relationship with the man she cheated on HS with, when she should instead be trying to restore the trust she broke, and therefore doing the exact opposite? Talk about a double standard.
I find it disturbing that she talks about being hurt and humiliated by him merely liking another girl -who doesn't like him back and is therefore no threat- for a very brief time, but does not acknowledge in any way, shape or form that what she herself did was about a billion times worst. What, since she is the type of person to cheat on her boyfriend and run off with another guy, then it's not a problem for her to flirt and indulge/lead on his cousin and DK, who she had cheated on her bf with, because it's a lower level of expectations, and her bf is used to her being fickley, while she is used to him having ever been in love with her and her alone? It seems insane, if there is someone that should take action to restore trust, and try to be mindful and understanding of any discomfort and insecurity her partner would rightly have while trying to heal and rebuild trust after her horrific betrayal, it would be her (that would include stopping with the flirting and not indulging the peopele that have feelings for her, setting clear boundaries, particularly with DK who she had an affair with for more than a year and run off with for two).
I mean, aside from basic morality, this is just practical. Again, no issue in principle with flirting or talking on the phone/spending time with ex-es, even one on one. If said ex is someone that you cheated on your partner with for more than a year, and then run off for two, and you are trying to get your partner to trust you again (and in any case you don't want to hurt them), than maybe phone calls and one-to-one meetings or lunches where you tease/flirt and you indulge them and make clever come-backs rather than set clear boundaries and tell them that this behaviour is not acceptable would be just practical. There simply isn't the necessary trust with her current partner for him to be okay, and confident that she would respect the boundaries and not backstab him, because in the past she didn't respect such boundaries and lied to his face for more than a year. Trust needs to be built up, and teasing, being flippant, jockingly asking about his opinion of her involvement with DK... if you need to ask, with DK as with her cousin, then you already know the answer. If he acts as if he is okay and he is not, then probably ask yourself why he doesn't feel confortable sharing that he is not okay, and realize that mocking his concerns is literally insane when he has every reason in the world to be concerned: her cheating with DK is not paranoia, it's something that actually happened after they had been together for almost a decade, and went on for more than a year.
She doesn't take his concerns seriously and doesn't seem interested in rebuilding trust (assuming that it's even possible, though the show basically doesn't make a big deal about it and sweeps the issue under the rug, completely unrealistically in my opinion... I mean, the mild unease of someone that had been dumped when she run off with another man is one thing, and is probably bigger than what he demonstrated in terms of insecurity, but here we are talking about her having a more than year long affair before running off with the guy without another word... this ought to have been much more of an issue, and it was mentioned, in much more muted tones, and then dropped).
This is a problem. She was lucky enought that HS waited for her and forgave her and took her back, the least she could do would be actually care about what HS thinks. If it's a concern, it deserves to be discussed and addressed seriously, not mocked. He needs to be comfortable sharing his fears and insecurities, while being given the safety to know that, even without agreeing, she would at least take his perspective and his concerns seriously. Instead they are made light of, and he puts up with the mocking tone. But it's not a jocking matter that should be treated flippantly. It's serious. And in this case, it's not paranoia, or him doubting a trustworthy person. It's something that actually did happen, and it's him dealing with someone that had already broken his trust by lying to his face for more than a year.
I was disappointed in not seeing them discuss her feelings for DK, his feelings for HS himself at the time and now, why she did what she did, why she changed her mind, and honestly discussing boundaries and what he is comfortable with (and if he tries to play it cool but it's obvious to everyone that he is not unaffected, and she sees it clearly, otherwise she wouldn't have asked, not to mention she used the still infatuated DK, who she had cheated on her bf with, to make her bf jealous... she clearly knows he doesn't like the guy and for good reason, even if he shakes his hand and acts as if he is not bothered... she knows all this, she just doesn't care, and she very much should, if she wants to rebuild trust... all the while asking *him* to not get too attached to FL -prescient words, but here it's not her that had been given any reason to fear she couldn't trust him-... again, my perspective on this is that give the context, it's perfectly fine to pay someone back with their own coin, and if you didn't show any honesty, loyalty and respect to someone, you are not entitled to any in return -for the same reason, I was perfectly fine with, say, the betrayed wife in A Good Lawyer's Wife cheating on her husband... and I actually did wish that things would have developed into a more serious triangle for the sake of the drama, but it instead turned into a one-sided mini-crush with a small kiss she didn't reciprocate... again, the premise being that he put up with her betrayal for more than a year, and then she run off with another man without a word for two years, so a one sided mini crush and small unreciprocated kiss are really so insignificant by comparison that anyone in her position, or anyone sane with any sense of perspective, really, should feel ashamed to even mention it in the same sentence... and I am saying she would have deserved it if a more serious affair happened? Yes, yes I am very much saying exactly that -she has no leg to stand on- and no, it wouldn't have been the same thing, because, again, someone that didn't show any loyalty, respect and honesty is not entitled to any in return: she cheated on someone that thought her incapable of anything of the sort, and that never even drunk coffee with another girl and was fully focused on her, while he would have cheated on someone that deceived him for more than a year, run off without another word with her lover despite his begging, and two years later came back fully expecting that he would be still waiting for her and entirely focused on her, telling him that things didn't pan out with the man she had cheated on him with for more than a year and run off to live with for two, and that she now wants to be with him again -the old pair of shoes she dropped on the side that she assumed, unfortunately correctly, she would find in the same place and still waiting for her-, and that didn't do a single thing to rebuild his broken trust, or in any way care to set boundaries, if not with his cousin, who was not a threat, at least with the ex she cheated with an who is still infatuated with her... if the question is "don't you trust me?", the answer is unfortunately that he has no reason to, and every reason not to).
That's the thing, she dares to talk about not trusting anymore, but it's him that has been given no reason to trust her, and there is simply no proportions (you can say that pushing someone after they shoved you is violence and punching people in the face at random in the street -aka the knockout game-, or shooting up a school, are also violence, but then you lose all sense of proportions... plus, again, 100% in support of the betrayed wife in The Magicians sleeping with another man: turnabout is fair play, if you dish it out, you should be able to take it, if you don't want there to be s**t, don't start s**t). The fact, given the context, is that she is not owed any trust, and apparently doesn't seem to care about reassuring him in the slightest, treating the question in a joking and flippant manner, which would have been appropriate had she been honest with him and not given him a reason to not trust her, but given that she had completely betrayed the trust he had put in her, her mocking or minimizing his concerns and dislike of DK, for example, is really gaslighting.
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Strong show
Nice show.Regarding YJ's apology, I really would have liked some clarification on two points:
1. Did she come clean about her more than year long deception to HS before running off with YH (who anyway knew about it while it was going on)? Did she apologize for that part at the time (i.e. not as part of the half uttered apology she said to him when he took her back? Because that's definitely a part that pertains to lack of honesty and respect and that she should have felt sorry and apologized for irrespective of whether she wanted to continue staying with HS. It's something the he absolutely should have been made aware of prior to any conversation about taking her back, in order to make an informed decision. I am not sure whether she knew he knew (hopefully if she didn't she told him at some point prior to the moment where she asked him to take her back). Again, this is something she should have apologized for two years ago, independently of whether she wanted to be with him or not. Not saying that she didn't, not saying that she did, but this would have been the best scenario in that situation given that it would have come at a non suspicious timing and would seem more genuine and less self serving.
2. Was the apology after he took her back including the bit about the more than year long deception, or was it about running off with her lover and not saying a word to HS for two years? In any case, I must say that the fact it arrives now, after two years of complete silence where she apparently didn't feel any need to do this, when she broke up with DK and wants HS to take her back, does make it feel less genuine than if it came at a less convenient (for her) timing and with no strings attached (i.e. while she was trying to convince him to take her back.
All in all, I do perceive in her a rather self serving streak that makes me wonder if the second one would have come at all had things gone differently with DK, as for the first one, I don't even know if it was made or if she came clean about the deception that HS already knew about (not asserting that it wasn't and she didn't), and if it did whether it happened at the time or now that she wants him back... we don't know anything, so it's hard to judge exactly what I am seeing. But I do get the suspicious that HS would have never heard from her again, like he didn't in the past two years, if things had gone differently with DK (but we don't know). But maybe things went differently with DK exactly because she decided she was in love with HS and not DK (HS's cousin seemed to imply that she left DK for him, and she seemed to be in love with HS and not DK, but as to what prompted this change of heart, we are left in the dark... she mentions a model, but it's unclear if it's DK's rebound... again, we know nothing). The thing is, her apology shouldn't really depend on whether she wants to be with HS or not. I think that it's reasonable to separate the pieces, and maybe when she loved DK and not HS and left with the former she didn't regret it, but she does not because she is no longer in love with DK but with HS instead... it would have been an interesting question to ask, because she still refers to it as "love" and says she "followed her heart" when she dumped HS for DK (and indeed if she fell out of love with HS and in love with DK there is nothing wrong with telling HS that and breaking up, what's wrong is the more than year long deception that is an entirely separate matter, and that she should feel sorry and apologize for irrespective of how things ended up with DK and HS, and as discussed above hopefully do so years ago, not now that she wants HS back.
The whole point being, I guess, that we don't have the information to get a clean picture, these are just some random thoughts on the matter and how I would feel about various scenarios and how self serving some scenarios could be compared to others.
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Worth watching
Nice show.I must say that YJ's behavior seemed more and more self serving the more one focuses on it, and I found myself wondering about her motivations and the very convenient and self serving timing of her apology after two years of silence, and wondering about alternative scenarios where she continued to not speak to HS because she didn't break up with DK, then reasoning that really, her feeling sorry for her behavior and apologizing for it shouldn't depend on her relationship status and the fact she now doesn't love DK and loves HS, then reasoning that we don't know what she told him two years ago, whether she confessed and apologized for her more than year long deception, or not, whether she is now apologizing for that or for leaving and not speaking with him for two years and now coming back to ask him to take her back, despite the more than year long deception where she was seeing DK behind his back, etc. So, timing is suspicious, what-if scenarios where she doesn't break up with DK are not encouraging in terms of whether regret and apology would have been forthcoming, but we cannot say anything definitive, and it's unclear whether she broke up with DK because she wanted to be with HS since now she doesn't love the former anymore and loves the latter -and HS's cousin seemed to imply that she broke up to be with him, though we don't know the circumstances, and it's unclear whether the model mentioned just once was a rebound, though we know DK is apparently still smitten with YJ and she is not shy about bringing up someone's cheating... but it's not clear whether that's what her comment meant, or whether the model was a rebound and she mentioned it because he asked about the musician, i.e. HS-. I really, really would have liked more detail on the motivations here, because how I feel about how self serving this all is depends a lot on it. The fact that the apology comes after her and DK broke up and she is trying to get HS to take her back after not talking with him for two years does seem self serving, but as I said we don't know how much she revealed about the more than year long deception and how much she apologized for back in the day vs now (one hopes that at least she knew he knew of the betrayal prior to asking him to take her back, because in the scenario where she though he didn't and she still made that request without telling him, it would be rather appalling in terms of taking away his ability to make an informed decision. But, again, we don't know anything about that. But it does add to the unease, and this certainly is not conducing to rooting for the pairing... I guess that with the lack of details, one can insert a sizeable amount of cope into the mix, and imagine the less horrible scenario (which might or might not be the more likely), though certainly some aspects of her behavior are just appalling full stop and we see them with our own eyes, and no amount of self deception can change the facts. Her lying to HS for more than one year is a fact, as is her brushing his words aside when he confessed the pain he felt in that period of more than a year where he acted as if he believed her but knew she was lying about work and meeting DK behind his back, as, for that matter, is her later mocking and flippant way in which she dismissed the whole thing, after the agony he demonstrated in that outburst by the side of the road... but let's not rehash her self serving and self absorbed behavior any further. Imho it was more than appalling enough that him waiting around for two years without a word from her was frankly hard to believe, and it was a shame he only got an aborted one-sided mini-crush and he didn't get to explore fully a relationship with someone that wouldn't mistreat him the way YJ did -and I would bet anything that FL wouldn't have dreamed of taking him for granted and deceiving him for more than a year the way YJ did, which is why basically anyone, or even no one, i.e. staying single, would have imho been a better choice to pursue rather than taking her back -immediately after she asked, basically, at that-. Again, compared to anything she did she really has no leg to stand on to complain, and at least in World of the Married the betrayed wife got to have a full blown affair, though she did in the end take the scumbag back... I very much prefer A Good Lawyer's Wife where in the end she not only sleep with another man, but gives the philandering husband the finger. I would have been so much easier to root for the pairing if it was not for the more than a year of deception, that's really one little detail that changes everything and they just drop it there without bothering to elaborate... absolutely infuriating.
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Coffee Prince is a one in a lifetime type of drama.
There are many dramas out there and though I haven't reviewed any of them or even added them to my profile on here, I have watched a lot of dramas.This drama is in my top 10 list. All the characters are consistent, even when they show character growth. Most of the characters are loveable and the relationships in this show is top-tier (though I disliked the second cp, but that's just my own personal opinion). Even though I have only watched this show once so far, I can already tell this is going to be a comfort show for me. The journey of Eun Chan and Han Gyul is simply breathtaking to watch. The chemistry between the actors was something I cannot describe.
Though I wished that more people other than Ha Rim understood the mental plight that Han Gyul was going through as someone who also struggled with their sexuality, I loved the fact that everyone's reaction was essentially: You still love her and she loves you.
That's what the show is about. It's love in all forms. The princes' relationships with each other was heartwarming and the last episode when Eun Chan reunites with them had me cheesing the entire time. The relationship between parent & child, friend & friend, cousin & cousin, sibling & sibling, grand-child & grand-mother, everything was just wonderful.
I am so glad I took a chance on this show and I hope you do the same as well.
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